Advice for autistic people experiencing depression

Emily Katy
Emily Katy
Blogger @ Authentically Emily
autism-depression

At a glance

  • Research suggests that depression is more common in autistic people than in non-autistic people
  • Speaking to someone is important, and there are lots of places that can offer treatment and support
  • Even the most severe depression is treatable. With the right support, you can feel better

Depression is a mental health condition which affects 3% of people in the UK every day. Unfortunately, it affects even more autistic people, with 50% reporting that it has a big impact on their day-to-day life.

There is of course the argument that more autistic people being depressed is just biology. The idea is that because our brains are wired differently, we’re more prone to depression.

As an autistic person, I know this isn’t true. It may be possible that I am more genetically vulnerable to depression, but I can tell you with absolute certainty that much of my depression stemmed from feeling complete confusion about the world, why I felt different, and why I felt so left out. It stemmed from feeling isolated from my peers, being bullied, and being forced to endure situations I found overwhelming and difficult. All of this cumulated into experiencing a depression I never thought I could get out of.

That time in my life is one I hope I never have to return to. I would wake up every morning wishing that I hadn’t. Just getting out of bed was a struggle. I felt so low and so unhappy that I would wish that I didn’t exist. The pain I felt was unbearable, and I thought that it would never end. But it did.

I don’t know how you’re feeling, or if your experience of depression is similar or completely different to mine. But what I do know is that depression is treatable, and there is a life ahead of you where you don’t feel this deep pain every single day. It may be that you don’t want my advice, which is completely okay. But, if you do, here are my tips for autistic people struggling with depression.

Seek professional help

I know that this can be so difficult, and I know there are so many barriers that autistic people face in seeking appropriate healthcare, but it’s so important to be able to access the right treatment for depression.

If you have a good relationship with your GP, they are a fantastic place to start. If you need to, you could write down how you’re feeling beforehand, or take someone with you. But, if speaking to your GP is too difficult, there are other places you can look. The National Autistic Society has a directory where you can find therapists with experience working with autistic people. Or the Association of Neurodivergent Therapists has a directory of neurodivergent therapists who you might find can understand you on a whole other level!

Talk to someone you trust

If you’re able, it’s so important to reach out. Sometimes just knowing that someone is there to talk to can make a big difference. I know that there are a thousand reasons why you may feel you can’t do this. But, if it is safe for you to do so, please do. You are not a burden, and more people care than you think.

Find support in online communities

There are so many autistic people online to connect with who can offer support, advice or even a chat about a shared special interest! Some great places to start are by searching #ActuallyAutistic on Twitter, Discord groups like the Narratives of Neurodiversity Network and communities like the Neurodiverse Self Advocacy. You’ll find that many autistic people in these communities have experience with depression, and this can help you feel less alone.

Try not to hold yourself to unattainable standards

I don’t know about you but I tend to look at what everyone around me is doing and think, “Why can’t I be like them?” Often, I find I’m comparing myself to people who are not autistic…people who do not have the same barriers to everyday life that I have. We’re not neurotypical, so holding yourself to neurotypical standards is simply unfair. I know that this is easier said than done, but it’s something I’m working on, and maybe you could too.

Self-care doesn’t have to look how you think it does

I hear about the importance of self-care a lot, but what does this look like for autistic people struggling with depression? Maybe it looks like just simply washing your face with a flannel or using dry shampoo when you can’t shower. It could be opening your curtains and your window when you can’t get outside, or allowing yourself to spend more time engaging with your special interest than usual because that’s what helps you to re-charge. Self-care is about the little things, which are really big things when you’re depressed.

Depression is horrible. It consumes you, lies to you, and steals the joy from everything. But there was a time when you didn’t feel this way, and there will be times like that again. Hold on for those days. The world needs you.

Share this post

About the author

Get free monthly content

Sign up for advice and guidance, delivered to your inbox every month

woman playing in the park
Scroll to Top